DAY ONE:
My room on the fourth floor was right across from the nurses station that meant a few things, one of them was I could hear the nurses talking...
So as it grew time for me to be moved from the fourth floor to the seventh I became very nervous... I guess it was mostly because of those ideas that were placed in my mind from the movies.... For example Shutter Island, Patch Adams and Awakenings...
I remember them telling me my room was available and if you know anything about hospitals you are not immediately taken to your room it is hours before you are moved,... So that allowed my mind to think about how horrible it was going to be and this made me more and more terrified about the "move".
I remember the nice young man who came to get me, I had not eaten in days, just the smell of food made me sick and whenever they gave me medicine I gagged (I still do). I guess that is one of the "side effects" of overdosing. I was taken from my room to the seventh floor by wheelchair... I was given my belongings which were not many in a bag and I remember clutching onto it as if it was the last item I would ever see.
As I was wheeled up to seven central also known as the psych floor I cannot describe the terror that I was feeling....
I remember the elevator door opening and he wheeled me in back wards and as that huge glass door closed shut my first thought was; "this must be what prison feels like"...
I was taken to my room (everyone had a roommate) my room number was 770 the last room in the place at the end of this long hallway... The room next to me was a man... I thought to myself "Why are there men and woman so close to each other why are they not separated?" The young man who brought me up to the floor gave me a tour of the place. As he showed me the Kitchen that was basically a ice machine, water and coffee machine that was only open during certain times of the day... Then there was a large lounge filled with many people playing cards, and some watching TV. then there was a woman's shower and a men's shower the rule that I liked the best was one person at a time in the shower.... there was a laundry room that was locked at all times... all the rooms were locked at all times accept the two lounges and the kitchen that had certain hours.
I remember him asking me were I wanted to go and I replied "to my room please" I was terrified of the laughing in the lounges and the people walking the halls,... As I sat in the room I looked at the emptiness...
There was what they call a box bed with no support at all there was a book case but all the doors were taken off and the hinges were removed... there was a waste basket but had a paper bag no plastic was allowed. The window was unable to open and within the two window pains were blinds what I was not able to close along with the blinds were a metal cage.... As I stared out the window I once again wondered if this was what prison was like.
I felt the need to get out of the wheel chair and go to the window... the sun was setting and as I stared at it I wondered if my daughter was looking at the same sunset,,,,
I soon got very tired and had to sit back down....
After sitting there and feeling sorry for myself I wheeled myself out in the hallway.... there I met some woman who were very friendly... They welcomed me and protected me from the few men who were trying to get attention... As I sat there they began telling me why they were there and even some great tips...
1.) DO NOT give away your food... This was a big one that I learned... The first couple days I could not eat and I just left it on table but after five days of no food the patients were more concerned then the nurse and or doctors.
When I could eat there were many that would ask "can I have" and or "are you gonna eat that"
2.) Make sure you get an extra drink when the kitchen was open for night time because when the kitchen was closed not many nurses would open it for you.
3) Watch out for "_____" He is a homeless man who has been here for four months, Every time it comes time for him to go home he falls flat on the ground so they will let him stay. I asked why and they said think about it....He has a warm shower, three meas a day plus snacks, warm bed and TV.
4) Oh yes and the schedule... it was not a time for rest and or laziness you were there to get help and you were to go to group sessions...
A) 7:00-7:45 Breakfast
B) 8:00 Rules this was the same everyday... the same rules read over and over
C) 8:15- 8:30 Make out menus
D) 9:00-10:00 Activity for the woman group for men
E) 11:00-12:00 Woman Group and Activity for Men
F) 12:00-12:45 Lunch
G) 2:00 Education
H) 5:00 Supper
I) Activity (bingo for example and if there was candy the more people played)
J) 8:30 Snack Could be a sandwich with juice or peanut-butter with crackers
K) 11:00 TV's OFF
My first night I did not get to bed till 11:30 because they changed my room. I needed a bed were the head of the bed would come up... Now before you go thinking it was a regular hospital bed it was not.... They had to crank it up by hand... I had never seen such a thing...
Another thing I had never seen was so much dirt in a hospital... The socks they gave me were black within an hour after they gave me...I guess they figured we were all to out of it to realize that we deserved a clean floor.
*Wow this has taken me back to a pace that I pray I never go again and I pray that the reader never has to go. I pray that my testament helps someone...
I beg you, do not wait for help... There is nothing wrong with getting help!
No comments:
Post a Comment